Monday, August 22, 2016

Because I'm Happy

There is a thing we must learn to do when we become adults. It sucks, and even after 46 (almost 47!) years, I'm still learning, as I'm sure we all are. Because it sucks, but it's part of life.

What is it that I'm talking about? 
Living with disappointment.

No one likes it, and we all wish we could always get our way but that's just not how things work.
Am I dealing with disappointment right now? No, not me. I'm... ecstatic. Life is pretty great for me at the moment... knock on wood!

Shit, I just jinxed it, didn't I?

spits, turns in a circle three times, slaughters a chicken... and fries that bitch!

Okay, now that I've fixed THAT damage... lol.
There are some people who are disappointed in the turn my Second Life has taken. When I met Michael, I had a nice little... er, stable... of lovers. And some of them aren't a bit happy that I've become, for the most part, for right now, monogamous all the sudden.

I get that, but I didn't do it on purpose... I never set out to upset anyone. And hell, none of them were happy enough to just be with me. They loved it that I was perfectly fine with them going out and fucking whoever... just as they were fine with me going out and fucking whoever.
The trouble starts when I'm out fucking whoever and find someone I want more than any of them. Someone I'm willing... nay, happy... to close my legs to other men for.

Well... as Beyonce says... "If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it".

Or something like that. Not an actual ring, mind you. but you know what I mean.
So there are some people living with disappointment right now.

Some of them even told me how disappointed they are in me. And THAT is something I have a very visceral reaction to.

I fucking hate it when people tell me that. Why? Because what it's really saying is "I'm disappointed that you're not behaving the way I think you should behave."

And I will react badly when someone says that to me.
Do I wish everyone in the world would behave the way I think they should? Yep, of course. Do I expect it? No, of course not.

And most importantly, do I go around telling people I'm disappointed in them? No. No, I don't. What purpose does that serve? If I'm disappointed in someone, or something, that's on me. I'm the one and only person who is responsible for that feeling.
There are several things that can happen when you tell someone you're disappointed in them, and none of them are good.

First, like me, they're probably going to bristle and get their back up. Fight or flight is going to kick in. They'll say "fine" and mute/block and you'll never hear or see from them again. Or they're going to tell you, in no uncertain terms, where you can stick your disappointment.

Secondly, they're possibly going to try to appease you. Try to be what it is you want them to be... and it's not going to work.
We'll either end up miserable, and making you miserable, because we're pretending to be something we're not. No one is going to end up happy in that situation.

And in the end, you're going to end up doubly disappointed.
But I'm not telling anyone anything they don't already know.

I'm happy. I like where I am right now and who I'm with. I like how my time in SL is spent and who I'm spending it with.
And though I'm sorry that disappoints some people... I'm not changing anything. This is my down time... my entertainment time. My time where I'm responsible to no one other than myself.

I have enough responsibilities in the real world.

In SL, I'm responsible for paying my tier and that's about it as far as how it relates to other people. I owe someone a payment so I can have my land, but that's about all I owe anyone.
Friends don't have to talk every day, or even every week or month. There is nothing in the rule book that says how much contact is required between friends.

Because there is no rule book.
And if anyone thinks I'm going to follow any imaginary rule book other than my own, they're going to be disappointed in me.
And that's their fault, not mine. 

Lastly, I want to talk about this t-shirt I'm wearing! OMG! This has been available for Maitreya and Slink, but it's now also available for Belleza! I was given a sneak peek earlier today... I don't blog clothing, and they didn't ask me to blog about this, but I LOVE IT SO MUCH I WANT TO SHARE IT WITH EVERYONE! Go, get it, beg them to make more stuffs for Belleza! Because this little t-shirt is sexy as fuck! It's made by Steelhead... clicky-click click to see it on the MP!

1 comment:

  1. Right on Beth! So glad to see you happy and WOW! your new look is so Hot! Ignore people dissing what you do.
    Sl is an escape a relaxation time and realistically if it isn't fun your doing it wrong! Hugs happy for you and your Man wow did he get lucky!!


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