Monday, December 18, 2017

Baby, Bi, Bi, Bi

Okay, my dears... I need some help. I'm having a bit of a conflict with a sweetie of mine and I need your help. First off, I need you to take this little poll for me, pretty please.



You see, we are having a BIG problem with whether or not I'm a liar when it comes to my sexual orientation.

It's this simple... He says I'm straight, I say I'm not.

Really, in the whole scheme of all this mess, it has less to do with my orientation and more to do with what he considers a lie.

I say I like women, sexually.

He says I do not.

Yeah, I know... I don't need the lecture about being involved with a guy who thinks he knows me better than I know myself. I'm already struggling with myself over this.

Do I think I'm bisexual? No, not really. Do I think I'm straight? No... I really don't think that either.

I also don't think that there are only three degrees to sexual orientation. I don't think it's as simple as straight, bi, or gay.

The fact is that there are some women I am attracted to on a sexual level. I absolutely have girl crushes, and those crushes are often incredibly sexual in nature.

Most women I'm not sexually attracted to. Also, most men I'm not sexually attracted to.

Am I more attracted to men? Yes, absolutely. When I go out hunting for a sexual partner for the night, am I looking for women? No. If I'm only looking for myself, I'm looking for a man.

If I'm looking for someone both of us can play with, I'm looking mostly for women, but also for men.

And the women I'm sexually attracted to? It's not about looks. Oh, of course, I want them to be hot, by my definition of hot, but it's more about who the woman is. It comes when I get to know a woman and we connect on a level that isn't "Oh, hi. Wanna fuck?"

And it can be intense when I make that connection with a woman. It's happened in RL, and it's happened in SL.

So what am I? Straight, bi, or gay? If I only have those choices, I would have to define myself as bisexual because there are in fact women I want to have sex with. They may be few and far between, but they're definitely out there.

But that label doesn't really fit in the most basic sense of the word. I'm am not equally attracted to both genders.

(For the sake of this argument, I'm not getting into the other genders or the trans community.)

I am far more attracted to men, on a purely base sexual level. When you get into knowing a person, though, that line becomes more hazy. There is emotion involved, intellect, sense of humor... and that really undefinable "X" factor that makes us all attracted to some people and not to others. That spark that we have with certain people. Somewhere between fucking, and making love, is another level. And I've felt that with almost exclusively men, but also with women.

So, as you do, I went searching the Google. I took some polls and quizzes. On not a single one of them did I come up as 100% straight, but neither did I come up as 100% bisexual. I used the Kinsey model, the Klein grid, and the newest one, the Purple-Red scale.

That's the most recent one I could find, the Purple-Red, and I want to focus on that. As time goes on, we're learning more and more about the complexities of human sexuality and this was the most in-depth scale I could find.

Here are the definitions:
Looking at this, I would classify myself as an E2.
Where would you fall? What's is your color?





I would really, really appreciate it if you could take these polls for me and help a sister out.

I've been dumped for lying. I don't believe I'm lying. I conceded to him at one point just to make peace, but that didn't work. Since he knows me so well sexually, even when I conceded, that meant I was originally lying to him.

I know I should probably just let it go and move on with a man who doesn't force me to put a label on my sexual orientation, but I love the big doofus, and other than his penchant for being stubborn and having to be right all the time, he's a truly amazing man. And I'd like to fix this mess if at all possible.

I know he's going to read this post, and hopefully see some results on here when you all answer the polls. Maybe I'll be completely wrong and find that most people end up being either straight or gay, or 100% bisexual straight up the middle. If so, I'll eat crow, though I don't know if it'll do any good. He's pretty firmly slammed the door on me and I feel awful about it.

I pride myself on not being a liar. I honestly don't believe I lied in this case. I don't recall a time when I ever said to him "yeah, I'm totally bisexual." I think I've always put conditions on that label.

Anyway... please take these polls for me, and if anyone wants to discuss it, leave your comments below and we'll chat!

And THANK YOU for taking the time to do this for me. I seriously appreciate it!

4 comments:

  1. I think you think too much :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are absolutely right, but overthinking things is kinda my thing. ;-)

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  2. Hey Beth, well I class myself as straight...but! I have friends both in SL and RL hat I play with and one of my good friends I have a huge attraction for but..we are both in straight relationships. We just like to play and yes both fancy each other. Would I consider us, me bi? No I wouldn’t...I don’t often get attracted to other sex..and far more picky..have to build a relationship with them more and class it as fun play...
    So yes I am straight but like to play occasionally with girls;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Girls are soft and pretty and smell good and we know how to lick pussy because we know what feels good. Why wouldn't we want to have sex with us?! ;-)

      Delete

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