Wednesday, March 22, 2017

A New Sheriff

Wow... it's been a minute since I posted anything, hasn't it?
I guess there just hasn't been much to post about, at least as far as SL is concerned. Up until just a few days ago, I hadn't been online much in the past month or so. Dad was ill again, and we had a stay in the hospital, and then rehab for a couple of weeks. Between work and being with him, by the time I got home at night logging in was the last thing on my mind.

But he's on the mend now so I'm back.
And, my god, have I been a horny girl! I've been in heat, and the worst part is that I haven't, or hadn't, found a good means to satisfy the cravings for sex. Oh, I had sex. Some of it was good sex, some was even great. But fulfilling? Eh, not so much.
Oh, and the searching! Searching for that lover, that one who would set me on fire and make me come apart! God, that can be exhausting. Jumping from sex club to sex club to sex club, reading profiles, weeding through, sorting, approaching men who were possibilities, discarding, being discarded. It's enough to wear a girl out! Even before there's any fucking!
And that always leads me to going back home, alone, being frustrated and horny and just generally crabby because of it.

So anyway, I'm back.
I'm hiding, though. Why? Oh, it isn't because I don't adore each and every one of you, especially those on my friend's list, but I'm involved in something new, with someone new, and I'm not inclined to try to defend or explain my choices to anyone at the moment.

And I'm spending my time with him, getting to know him, enjoying his company, falling for him. And I know there are lectures in store for me from some people. And some others who are going to be less-than-happy that my pussy is off the market once again.
I'm with T now. Being with him makes me happy, and makes me feel fulfilled. He's very different from my last... many... lovers.

For one thing, he'll fuck me. And that's something I clearly need. Romance is a wonderful thing, but at the end of the night, let's face it - I want to get laid. Often. Orgasms are a huge part of why I'm in SL at all, and without those, there just isn't a good reason to spend my time there.
I've some some lovers over the past few months. Some have been great, but there hasn't been a connection with them on any deeper level, and I think we all know that sex is best when there is a strong connection.

The second thing that sets T apart is who he is. Or what he is. Or a part of him, anyway. I've made no secret of the fact that I have a very submissive side. And that side of me hasn't had any attention in a very long time. Even when I was with my sweet Hugh, it just wasn't his thing and I wasn't going to try to make him be someone he's not.
 T is dominant. No, he hasn't given himself some goofy title like Sir Master Domination or something. He doesn't need to. It's just who he is. He doesn't wear bad biker leather, and doesn't have a list of demands on his profile. He doesn't insist I call him Sir, or Master, or keep me locked in a cage, or any of that goofiness.

As a matter of fact, he hasn't even broached the subject of it all with me... I'm always the one who brings it up because I'm craving his domination so much. He hasn't demanded to be my owner (I give that willingly), he hasn't demanded anything of me. What I give, I give because I want to. Domination is certainly part of who he is, but it isn't all that he is.

It's natural to him... not forced, like so many of the fake doms in SL. And he's also not a closet misogynist, like so many of the fake doms in SL. He loves women, respects them. He respects me. He's proud of the woman I am and doesn't see any need to try to change me, like some have.
There will, eventually, I hope, be a collar around my neck. I will wear it proudly. I'm positively aching to be bound, in every way. My skin is craving the lash of the whip... so far, I've only gotten a few delicious smacks on my ass. But I know more is coming... and I can't wait.

At this point in my life, this is what I want. It is a huge part of what I've needed for a long time. Something I've wanted to explore, but haven't had the right man to explore it with.

I'm cautiously optimistic right now. We all know I've been stung before (see my last blog post) and I'm very well aware that I'm taking a risk again in giving my heart to someone. I'm okay with that. Without risk, there is no reward.

I want to take all the risks. And I want to take them with him.
If nothing else, it should lead to some good filthy blog posts, right? I will be writing much more in depth about this... adventure... as we get into it. Much more about my thoughts, my experiences. I'm positive my brain will get muddled as fuck and I will need to use this space to sort through it all. And I've been given his blessing to do so. He encourages this outlet, and I'm so glad for that. I know I will need it.

But right now... right now, I just need him.

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