Sunday, March 23, 2014

It Was A Very Good Day

I do this thing when I'm in relationships...
And now that I'm in two... this thing I do is rather multiplied.

I get weird.

Well, anyone who reads this blog knows that.
I get restless... and trust me, it's not a restlessness with my men. It's that I fall so deeply in love that I just can't imagine that they feel the same way.

That first rush of love... when it's all new and shiny and exciting... I have a hard time getting past that stage in most of my relationships. And so I tend to sabotage them by getting weird.
And now I have these two men... these wonderful men who love me beyond measure and I very badly want both of these men to be in my world for a very long time.

So today was a good day.
My morning... well, early afternoon since I didn't roll out of bed until 11... was spent with my darling Mick. I have put this man through the ringer in our six weeks. Parts of it were incredibly painful, for both of us, but we needed it to come to understand each other. Our expectations and our needs.

And now we're in such an amazing place.
I got to spend my late afternoon with my Hugh. My shelter in the storm.

He's been a bit out of pocket as of late... that damn real life can creep up on us and steal us away... so being able to spend the time we had together today was heaven. The way he loves me steals my breath away.
In fact, the way both of these men love me steals my breath away. I know it sounds as if I'm bragging... but I'm not. I am so truly humbled and amazed by what I have with Hugh and Mick.

In past relationships in SL, I start to question things around the 2 month mark.
Why do they love me? Do they really love me? They can't possibly really love me. And, BOOM, I sabotage that shit.

You know what? I'm not going to do it this time.
I'm going to not just accept, but understand, that when the shiny newness wears off, it doesn't mean things are dying. It's an evolution. There is a strength in riding through the all the paths a relationship takes. A new, deeper intimacy. Something far more spectacular in its own quiet way than all the fireworks of those first few weeks.

I'm happier than I've ever been in SL. These two men fulfill me in ways I never dreamed possible in a virtual world.

I will not sabotage it this time, damn it.
And as if that weren't enough, my day ended by meeting someone new. Not a potential new boyfriend by any stretch of the imagination... but a man who seems to be a true dominant that could be someone to fulfill my, er... darker needs. Only time will tell with that one.

It was a very good day, indeed.

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