Thursday, November 14, 2013

It Ain't No Gender Thang

We're all fucked up, boys and girls alike.

And we're all perfectly wonderful, too.

You men like to be all "alpha". And we girls (at least the ones like me) get all gooshy over that type of behavior. We love it.

But... strip away that alpha layer and there's a vulnerable little boy hiding out there, just like there's a vulnerable little girl hiding inside of me.

We show that side in different ways... Some of us blog the shit out of it and spill our souls for the world to see. I'm starting to think I'm the Taylor Swift of the SL Blogger World. I will blog the shit out of my experiences with you, good or bad.

Those of you who know me know I can't keep my feelings to myself. If I love you, I'm going to tell you that I love you. And if you piss me off, I'm also likely to tell you to go fuck yourself.

Luckily, though, most of my interactions tend towards the warmer side of things. I believe SL sometimes allows us to strip away certain societal norms and just be ourselves... our lovely, twisted selves. And that's one of the things I do love best about it.

This quest that I'm on... this search for the Holy Grail of my second life... to find the perfect partner for me, all the while embracing my inner slut and fucking my way through the men I meet. It's both frustrating and exhilarating.

I've had a few disappointments and a few wonderful surprises. Taking a look at men that I'd sort of passed over before and opening my eyes a bit wider.

Men amuse me and baffle me. I have one on my radar right now... and I don't know what the hell he's looking for. I like him a lot. I felt we connected in a quite lovely way. It seemed we were both seeking something and had a lot in common.

Today, I took a look at his profile. Seems he'd updated it quite a bit since the first time I peeked at it. It's suddenly full of lists... Like, dislikes, do's and don'ts (don't's?), turn ons, turns offs and requirements.

I think I'm pretty fucking awesome and after reading it, I came away feeling quite inadequate. Nobody can fucking live up to those standards. Every single one of us is flawed. You want me to be perfect? Not just in SL, but RL, too? Oh, hell no... I'm not setting myself up for that kind of fall again.

Anyway, one of his items is that women should move on from him if he doesn't seem interested. Um...okay... What? To quote the delightful Sugar Brown, "Ain't nobody got time for that."

How about growing a pair and telling a woman if you aren't interested instead of making them read whatever signals you think you're sending out?

This is my problem with the so-called alpha male. You mistake your passive-aggressiveness for being stoic and manly. That's some bullshit right there. Pull up your big boy panties and learn to fucking communicate. It's not always easy, can't we all agree, as adults, that it's the best way to be?

Being able to say, "Hey, I think you're the bee's knees" OR being able to say, "Hey, you know, you're really not my thing," is showing some serious strength of character.

And gentlemen? Showing character is fucking sexy as shit.

Even if it's delivered with the sting of disinterest, at least it's open and honest.

And that's my definition of an alpha male.

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