Monday, October 14, 2013

I Got 99 Problems...

But a bitch ain't one.

I'm going to stray away from the topic of my love life for this post... and my sex life, too, a bit. I'm going to talk about misogyny.

I'm really rather conflicted about it... have women achieved equality? Being a woman has never stopped me from doing anything except writing my name in the snow and I was raised by a really incredible set of parents who were intelligent and open-minded. Most especially my mom, but she brought Dad right along on the journey with her. Most of his life, he was a staunch conservative republican but the older he got (gets) the more liberal he becomes. At 84, I'm pretty certain he's on several FBI watch lists from all the letters he's written to Mitch McConnell and former presidents Bush and Bush. When one of my brother's got married (to a man!), my dad was the very first one to jump up after the ceremony and hug them both.

This was pretty much all my mom's influence. She taught him, and us, to see individuals and not sexual identity, or skin color, or religion. She was a devout Atheist, but when the Mormon kids would come knocking on our door, instead of sending them away, she invited them in, listened to them, talked to them about her beliefs and fed them a home cooked meal.

In the early 60s, in a small backwards town in southern Kentucky, my oldest brother's best friend was black. My family were outsiders in this town... and my mom was a foreigner at that. When my brother and his friend sat at the local drugstore's lunch counter and were told that the black friend couldn't sit there, my mom organized a protest. And won. I should mention that my dad was a drug salesman and this store was a client of his... he could have lost his job over this in the early 60s, but he stood right by my mom, my brother and his friend. They may not have changed the world, but they changed our little town.

So, yeah, anyway... my mom raised me to know that I'm equal to any man in every way that matters.

I'm disgusted by hip-hop music... the artists... the misogyny. Bitch, whore, slut. Chris fucking Brown, the stain on humanity.

But... I've also come to realize that while those words have their history embedded in referring to females... men can be bitches, sluts and whores, too.

I'm semi-submissive when it comes to sex. Look, men and woman ARE different creatures. I want lovers who are manly men. Alpha males. Dominant, sexually. Nothing turns me on more than a man who wants to just... take me. Fuck me. Spill his seed inside me, or all over me. I want to be left breathless, bruised and battered. But humiliated? No. Not my game, not for me.

I want a man who treats me, not as a delicate flower, but as an equal human being. I can be just as rough as any man and a man who respects that and fucks me like the animals we are drives me wild.

Which leads back to domination vs. humiliation. The two do NOT have to go hand in hand. Because I'm submissive in bed, I've been called a wide variety of names... not just bitch, slut and whore... cum bucket and cum slut are very popular.

But you know what, gentleman? You are just as much of a slut/whore/bitch as I am. You might be the one calling the shots, but you're just as much of a whore for pussy as I am cock.

And it's sad that in this day and age, I even have to point that out.

Why does that turn dominant men on so much? The name calling? Why not show the respect and be overjoyed that you've got a woman beneath you that wants a raw fuck just as badly as you do?

I'm not speaking for all women... I know there are some who totally get off on that and I'm not here to judge them. Sexuality isn't simple. It's all tied into our brains and our brains are enormously complicated.

And to make it even more complicated, after the sex, I turn into a total girly-girl and want to be pampered... kissed, caressed, cuddled. I expect my dominant lovers to become a human being who sees me as his complete equal and wants to cherish me as much as I cherish him.

That doesn't have anything to do with love... It's all part of sex. Foreplay, action, afterglow. Each element is equally important in my mind.

Yeah, I know this post is rambling and all over the place so I'll shut it now. It's just been on my mind and as much as I love giving you (if anyone is actually reading this) pervy pictures of myself and my lovers, I also like to give you something to think about every once in a while, too.

Keep learning. Keep growing.

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